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McDerpingheimer III

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About McDerpingheimer III

  • Rank
    Fuwa Regular
  • Birthday March 13

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  • Gender
    Male
  • Location
    Bumfuck Nowhere, USA
  1. Thank you, very readable!
  2. First translation

    I mean, sure, if you want to produce a version of the game routed through a round of Telephone.
  3. Hello, Goodbye Steam Storepage Removed

    give back anime tiddy
  4. VN Article

    The vocab might be undoubtedly higher-level, but I'm going to cast that shadow of doubt upon its status as well-written. In a way, it somewhat reminds me of my high school English essays: the writing may appear to be sophisticated and intellectual, but it is not necessarily superior for that. The analysis of a VN's merits, qualities, and themes is merely skin-deep, covering a broad and comprehensive overview of the VN as a whole rather than delving deeply into a single element of it, and as a result, the article ends up feeling rather superficial. Certainly, the phrasing is professional, academic, and advanced, and I cannot deny a markedly erudite tone to the work, but there appears to be a certain sort of distance created between the author and the audience that lessens the impact of the recommendations. Were one to read it, they would likely feel unable to appreciate the sentiment placed within the text. But, that's an awfully drawn-out and pretentious way to put it. If your eyes glazed over when you read that, you're probably getting the point. In simpler words, after each recommendation, I get the feeling of having read a whole bunch of nothing, because it doesn't connect with me. Now, it's not that there should be a deeper analysis, since these are just quick reviews designed to interest the reader in the VN, and they shouldn't have any spoilers. Really, the issue is that the tone and style don't really fit this level of analysis. It would fit better if you were writing about some d e e p s h i t explored in the game, maybe a reflection on the core theme, but that'd be something for people to read after a VN, not before. These are recommendations, intended to make people want to read something, so you gotta appeal to people, and to do that, you can't have the distance between author and audience that "essay language" creates. Essay language sounds sanitized and boring, and while it's not false, it's not genuine either, because it feels like it's losing the heart of the author in order to take on some affectation of intellectualism. None of these elements are good for reaching the audience. So, what's to be done? The solution is to be casual, simple, and straightforward. A line like "It is not a happy experience." (from the Muv-Luv portion) sounds stilted and unnatural. A simple "It hurts." flows much better, conveys feeling much better, and interests me much better. A line like "It is when one reaches Alternative, the real meat of the narrative, that Muv Luv becomes an explosion of emotion" seems weird in the same way. I'd say something like "When you get to Alternative, the real meat of the narrative, Muv-Luv starts to hit your heart hard" would work much better. Changing all of those "they"s and "one"s to "you"s would probably help too, since speaking directly to an audience will connect better than speaking to some nebulous avatar representing the audience. In summary, I wouldn't say this article is well-written. It's higher-level in vocabulary and arrangement, but that doesn't make it well-written, because a significant part of the quality of writing is how well it does what it's supposed to do, how well it reaches the audience with its intent. This article fails to interest the audience as well as it needs to, because it fails to connect with them as well as it needs to.
  5. VN Article

    Didn't Kaguya make this already www
  6. Public Service Announcement

    I feel so enlightened i should complete my transformation and put on my kimono and get my balsa wood katana then i’ll truly be japanese
  7. I’d say the only case in which not knowing the story is when basically everybody who’s played the game with story agrees the story is a complete dumpster fire, which is naturally a really rare occurrence in “awesome games.” In any other case, you’re missing out on a large part of the experience, and since I highly doubt you’ll want to come back to the game and play the entire thing when you can understand the story (whether you’ve learned Japanese or the game’s been translated), you’re essentially ruining the experience for yourself. Even if you do end up liking the gameplay enough to go through the game a second time, it’ll still be noticeably worse than if you played the full experience the first time. So yeah, I’m gonna second the general opinion of no.
  8. MoeNovel's next title - Cross Channel

    this isn’t an entirely fair comparison tho like i’d rather have vanilla ice cream than fried chicken wing, licorice, or wasabi ginger flavored ice cream
  9. Got Me a Job Interview at My Local KFC

    good luck may colonel sanders approve of your culinary skills
  10. Falling Star (Updated with screenshots)

    inb4 word count includes each time you go through the common route and events copy pasted between routes
  11. Is Moenovel the 4Kids of VNs?

    They’re not 4kids until they replace Cross Channel’s OP with a rap
  12. Tell a joke using the user above you.

    your name is @Silvz but there isn’t even any silver in your avatar, smh
  13. Hi!

    Holy shit they actually did it and fast too
  14. Hi!

    Welcome to Fuwanovel! Have you started working on a game, or are you still in the process of finishing up the writing and moving to games?
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