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Confession: Hello, everybody. I'm back from my month-long break from the interwebs. It was something I decided to do after reading Digital Minimalism and deciding to adopt a more focused lifestyle that doesn't involve compulsively browsing the internet, and so far it's going well! I'm able to engage in more productive activities to cope with anxiety, I'm learning how to avoid information overload, and I'm not allowing myself to be manipulated by new-generation technology. For the longest time I've been relying too heavily on quick fix life hacks to get my life together, and the book I read suggested that it's not enough to tackle the issues of hyper-connectivity. I need to establish a philosophy on tech so that I can maintain a greater lifestyle balance, and the book has some excellent advice in regards to that. One of those tips involved taking a 1-month hiatus from all optional technology so that I can practice better judgment for when I reintroduce them into my life. So far, I've decided to drop facebook entirely. I don't feel particularly close to anyone there except for my family, and I can just call them when I need to talk to them. I'm going to strictly limit my use of YouTube to educational use only. I've decided I don't want to use Discord anymore either (sorry, @mitchhamilton!); I just can't bring myself to use it moderately. I am going to restrict my time on Fuwanovel to 30 minutes and turn off all notifications as well. If I'm expecting replies to something, I'll just go directly to the thread. The issue with notifications is that they invoke addictive tendencies for me, and I just don't want to deal with them anymore. That said, I've gotten so much emotional support here that I just can't bring myself to leave completely. I wouldn't have even gone to therapy if it weren't for this very thread, and it was thanks to therapy that I even managed to start college at all. I still love the community here too. It wasn't hard to decide that I needed this forum in my life, even if it does seem a little odd for a minimalist, lol. Anyways, I'm happy to finally be back here. I missed you guys! (And that's it for my 30 minutes, lol. I'll be back on tomorrow~)

The monotony of school is an oppressive force on a kid's life. Psychologically omnipresent, you don't even need to be within its walls to feel its chains shackling you. Home is just made an extension of its presence with homework. And more then just the boredom of rote memorization and a lobotomizing curriculum, there is a social arena where you must interact with the other prisoners. Regardless of how you feel about them, its important to at least maintain a sociable facade. Unlike College where education is on your own dime, and therefore your own time. The grade school schedule from kindergarten through high school is rigidly compact, and generally you have little say in what you get to study. Regardless of talent, interest, or relevancy, you are stuck in a classroom where most other students are just as unenthused to be there as you. 8th Grade, 13 years old and my last year in junior high. I didn't need to put more than a minimal effort into my studies to attain the reputation as an honor student. Although on a superficial front I got along with everyone, I lacked any true connections that extended beyond the solidarity of being prisoners of the educational system I've just described. Life was dull, but everyone told me the path I was walking down had success and stability at the end of its road. That assumed I would continue playing the honor student role I fell into though. Despite the agency of free-will, I was complacent. Despite my ennui, I had little initiative or courage to stir things up. The irony of attending a Catholic school and passively turning a blind eye to the bullying occurring. The frustration of my sexuality awakening but being too emotionally impotent to do anything about it. This is the context in which I discovered Yume Miru Kusuri: A Drug That Make You Dream. Past midnight, and I had just finished downloading a copy of the VN. I had promised myself to install it then go to bed. Opening the application up as a test, I was greeted with a soothing yet hypnotic track. Three girls with blank expressions were looking up at me amid an infinite expanse of vaguely drawn school desks. For minutes I just listened, utterly mesmerized. It was as though I was experiencing a drug that was making me dream. Winter break started the next day, and I had previously installed another visual novel that I was intending to start first. But as my consciousness was drifting in the dazed state before sleep, the title theme track kept ringing in my head. The next day I decided to start my vacation playing this VN instead, and that has made all the difference. The opening scene, an image of a generic blue sky with soft clouds. The narrator himself falls asleep and soon finds himself in an odd dream. Upon violently waking up, soothing music akin to the title screen track plays, and without even realizing it my own thoughts are absorbed by Kouhei's inner monologues. His thinking was so natural, and familiar. And that's when I noticed, I was Kouhei Kagami. The issues of bullying, interpersonal relationships, and the desire to escape the dullness of reality (albeit not through drugs, for me anime was my escape) were all subject matters I understood, and more importantly related to. The way things play out in the various routes always remain grounded in a firm realism. Which easily allowed me to project myself into the situations. But unlike a generic self-insert protagonist, what made Kouhei so relatable was his distinct voice. He was hesitant to tread towards anything that could shake him off his honor-student trajectory, and yet he was equally tempted and fascinated by such things. Smoking, sex, drugs, standing up to social forces; all things that even the most straight laced of teenagers will probably be tempted by. If not for the things themselves, then to grab control of your own life by actively doing something you shouldn't do. This is how Kouhei and I were kindred spirits. The way the story and Kouhei's perspective completely resonated with me led me to voraciously read something for the first time in my life. Before I always viewed reading as a chore, and I only ever reluctantly did so. Reading this VN however, led me into feeling as though everything was happening was to a slightly older, Japanese version of myself. It was that immersive quality that sucked me into the VN's world. That was my baptism into VNs. I'm 22 now, and rereading this VN I can't help but think back on myself and who I was when I first discovered it. Not only have I long since graduated high school, somewhere amidst my early adulthood I also learned to stop being such a passive participant in life. Yet while I can no longer identify with Kouhei Kagami like I did when I first read his story, I can still understand his thinking and actions so clearly. Almost like reading his perspective brings me back to my perspective when I was in my early teens. In that respect, Yume Miru Kusuri is kind of the Catcher in the Rye of VNs.

Reading this kind of stuff always makes me realize what a weirdo I am. I never saw school as oppressive. I'm still very fond of pretty much every bit of "useless knowledge I've gathered there and was too oblivious to most things around me to even stress out about my outsider's status. Maybe also because I never experienced negative parts of school life beyond mild teasing. But I'm also the kind of person to whom rebelling against their circumstances is pretty foreign concept. Or rather, it took something extremely f***** up for me to actually act out. School was comforting. Clear rules, clear goals, clear future. I could stay in such system forever. You get a lot of "freedom" when you get out of it, but I feel it serves l best for people that have the energy to conquer the world. I have yet to find any use for it. So, if I read this VN, I find it quite likely I would feel nothing. I wonder how many people like me are there..

Major Update TWBU has received a massive art overhaul! All of the backgrounds have been replaced, CGs edited, one CG redone, and a brand new CG added! There are several other smaller fixes to the game to improve the overall quality as well. Basically, if you haven't checked it out before, now's the perfect time! Steam Page ♥ Itchio Page ♥ Twitter

It's so crazy, the way everything was so foreign to me. Everything the girls did or pushed the protagonist to do... It's so out of the realm of possibility, me even considering it or sharing any of those feelings, that I enjoyed the strange, foreign experience. As you might guess, I share your opinion.

There is actually an ending if you choose to be complacent. Its not considered a good ending, but its not exactly a bad one either. It does do a good job of putting everything into perspective though. So you may appreciate that. While I do think YMK is a really good all around VN. I really just wanted to highlight why I subjectively like it so much in this post. Perhaps in the future I might do a more objective and analytical post about it. But I'm not sure.

So these are the games I've played 9-nine Episodes 1, 2 Aokan-Four Rhythms Across the Blue ChronoClock Fureraba G-senjou no Maou Hello, good-bye Hoshizora Memoria Wish upon a Shooting Star How to Raise a Wolf Girl My girlfriend is the president Neko-nin exHeart +plus Nachi Hen, Saiha Hen Neko-Nin exHeart 2 and +Plus Newton and the Apple Tree Sabbat of the Witch Saku Saku Love Blooms with the Cherry Blossoms Sakura Sakura Shining Song Starnova SukiSuki Tenkiame The Ditzy Demons Are in Love With Me The Witchs Love Diary Yotsunoha

Finished Vel route for Love Esquaire. The journey was great, and that romance was charming me with that cute little red-head brawler. I liked that dating sim a lot for the comedy value... I think you can't go wrong with it. Even though I had to replay the whole thing since one choice screwed me up and left me in Friendzone. It is really not a lot of change between endings sadly. Hentais were added only just to say it may be patched for +18 but that's it. Maybe I will do a third playthrough. The gameplay though and the girl events... damn they kept me glued into my chair. Sort of review below. https://steamcommunity.com/id/SaoTheDreamer/recommended/849740/

I guess, this month I'm watching more anime than I usually do in a year. Kaguya-sama: Love is War. You know, this show is amazing! Absolutely loved the comedy, and it's exactly the type of romantic comedy that I enjoy the most. The only major drawback is the lack of a satisfying ending, so, I guess, it's time to wait for season 2. I may read the manga, but I don't really enjoy manga as much as VNs, LNs or anime, so I'd rather wait for season 2 for now. If It's for My Daughter, I'd Even Defeat a Demon Lord. Well, it was better than I expected. Definitely a cute and also surprisingly touching story. Again, the only real flaw is the lack of real ending, and, moreover, this show overall feels just like an extended prologue. I probably will read the LN at some point. Phantom in the Twilight. Just randomly stumbled upon this show on Crunchyroll, and, you know, this one is a good example that I have bad taste. Both the story and the worldbuilding were a complete trainwreck, but, somehow, I still liked this show in the end and enjoyed it immensely. Though, admittedly, I laughed at how cliche and chuuni some scenes were. At the same time, the production values are pretty good, the voice actors are very recognizable, and the protagonist is pretty entertaining to watch too. Also, I quite liked this ending song.

Started watching Kaguya-sama. And it's great! Actually, come to think of it, do I actually like these pseudo-aristocratic settings?