What do you think of this plot premise?

[laiktail]

Hey Fuwanovelians. I want to ask a very simple question: is the following plot a VN you'd like to read in the future? 

--- 

"If you can create everything, then tell me...can you create this?" 

 

'Imagine City'. A bustling metropolitan city fuelled by only one resource: imagination. Coffee materializes out of the thoughts of the city's baristas, buildings pour out from the wishes of the city's architects, and whatever is created in the mind by the city's inhabitants will come to life. A playful but cynical loner, Masaru, is a celebrity in the city for being the one person that is so creative, he can make anything from his mind that people ask of him. That is, until he meets the vivacious beauty Chiyo, who shows him a mysterious book that he can't recreate - and that will change his life forever. 

 

--- 

 

I'd like to know if you guys think I should develop this into a full VN. I'd love your honest, brutal feedback! 

[babiker]

Wow, looks pretty interesting and original. Though you might try to give us a little more info on the "book". But other than that, nice premise.

[DoodlyNyan]

Pretty interesting, but creating things from imagination seems too OP. I think you need to restrict it either with the needs of great power or only a few imaginative persons that could create it.

[Xypers]

:|

Edited December 2, 2018 by Xypers

[Funyarinpa]

Don't call it "Imagine City", that's incredibly generic. Otherwise, I am really interested but like Xypers said, if you do not restrict it there would be problems.

 

E:G: The MC could just (for the lack of a better term) imagine-create "a machine that can create that book".

 

Also, give at least the MC a personality- maybe this guy is a gang leader, maybe he is a big man in the black market, maybe he is in a cartel, or maybe he works for a company- give us the impression that s/he does not deal out this ability for free. Detail the society: maybe only some people have this "imagine-creating" ability, maybe your lifetime gets shorter if you use it, etc. We need a bigger atmosphere than what is presented.

 

 

I really like the premise though! Good job!

[Nagisa_Fawkes]

It does seem interesting and something I'd enjoy reading, but I can't help thinking how a city like that wouldn't be harmonic. unless every single person cooperates. If your protagonist can imagine anything, I'd imagine he'd be a criminal in the eyes of the authorities, and not a celebrity, because nothing would stop him from imagining thing that would be harmful to other people or the society as a whole right?

[crunchytaco]

Planescape Torment: One of the best stories people have never heard of. In that universe thoughts are so powerful they shape the planes themselves. People come and dissappear on a whim. Entire worlds are created from the darkess depths of emotions. Doorways to these worlds lead back to where one city can open them all if the correct thought, words, or item associated with those thoughts are held in the right place and time. Sigil is similar to that city you speak of. I suggest playing that game if you haven't to get some good ideas.

[Tenkuru]

Hey Fuwanovelians. I want to ask a very simple question: is the following plot a VN you'd like to read in the future? 

--- 

"If you can create everything, then tell me...can you create this?" 

 

'Imagine City'. A bustling metropolitan city fuelled by only one resource: imagination. Coffee materializes out of the thoughts of the city's baristas, buildings pour out from the wishes of the city's architects, and whatever is created in the mind by the city's inhabitants will come to life. A playful but cynical loner, Masaru, is a celebrity in the city for being the one person that is so creative, he can make anything from his mind that people ask of him. That is, until he meets the vivacious beauty Chiyo, who shows him a mysterious book that he can't recreate - and that will change his life forever. 

 

--- 

 

I'd like to know if you guys think I should develop this into a full VN. I'd love your honest, brutal feedback! 

This is indeed a very interesting concept. "If you can create everything, then tell me...can you create this?" will make for a great tagline. However, I feel that you should add a catch to the power of imagination, or maybe some rules. The rules themselves don't need to be clearly stated or specific. The more simple and subtle the restrictions are, the more you get to loop around it to create unexpected twists to surprise the readers. One example I'd like to bring up will be HakoMari. It's a light novel that revolves around a being, 'O', who is a distributor of boxes that grants any one wish perfectly and flawlessly. This makes the readers think that there is no catch to it, that it is unrestricted. However, that is not true. How the author plays around with this idea is that since the box grants wishes with utter completeness, even the user's doubts of whether his wish will come true will also be granted. This allowed plenty of plot twists and the author is a genius at exploiting that. Sorry for the wall of text, you should go read HakoMari if you want to get some amazing ideas. 

[laiktail]

Love the feedback everyone, thank you so much!  

 

 

Wow, looks pretty interesting and original. Though you might try to give us a little more info on the "book". But other than that, nice premise.

Good idea. The contents of the book actually won't make sense to both Masaru and the reader for a long, long time. 

 

 

There are so many possibilities to a city where thoughts come true that I'd hate it if you didn't use the premise it to the fullest. For instance, what happens when someone goes mad? How do people keep secrets? How does education affect the population? What about art? How is Masaru different from everyone else?

 

I like the city very much. It can be home to amazing characters. I'd look forward to see what you can do with it, but it's a great responsibility.

 

So many ideas to explore. I haven't fleshed out the specifics because this idea only popped up into mind a few days ago. But I will definitely explore questions like this. thanks Palas!

 

 

Pretty interesting, but creating things from imagination seems too OP. I think you need to restrict it either with the needs of great power or only a few imaginative persons that could create it.

 

yeah if you don't restrict this in some way its too op and anyone going mad would just destroy everything

 

Thanks DoodlyNyan and Xypers for pointing this out. What I'm thinking about at the moment is making it similar to a currency. Since the entire system runs on imagination, it is limited in the amount of "money" one has; if individuals create things that people like, then they get more "money" (hence how people earn a living working). Maybe. This is something that I'll think about.  

 

 

Don't call it "Imagine City", that's incredibly generic. Otherwise, I am really interested but like Xypers said, if you do not restrict it there would be problems.

 

E:G: The MC could just (for the lack of a better term) imagine-create "a machine that can create that book".

 

Also, give at least the MC a personality- maybe this guy is a gang leader, maybe he is a big man in the black market, maybe he is in a cartel, or maybe he works for a company- give us the impression that s/he does not deal out this ability for free. Detail the society: maybe only some people have this "imagine-creating" ability, maybe your lifetime gets shorter if you use it, etc. We need a bigger atmosphere than what is presented.

 

 

I really like the premise though! Good job!

Haha about 'Imagine City'! You're right, it's very generic. I guess the aim was to be straight to the point here. Love the feedback about the MC and also about detailing the society. The MC will (at this point) be someone who can't refuse a challenge if it comes to his creative abilities. Lots to think about still about his personality and what position he is in in society etc. as it'll depend on the ultimate message I want to convey with the visual novel.  

[laiktail]

It does seem interesting and something I'd enjoy reading, but I can't help thinking how a city like that wouldn't be harmonic. unless every single person cooperates. If your protagonist can imagine anything, I'd imagine he'd be a criminal in the eyes of the authorities, and not a celebrity, because nothing would stop him from imagining thing that would be harmful to other people or the society as a whole right?

He's a bit of a badass. vicious people are created out of vicious situations. Kind people recreate kindness. I can't say more than that because it might be a spoiler for a plot that doesn't exist yet. Haha. As for a non-harmonic city...real life cities aren't actually all that harmonic either. There's ways to steal, cheat, lie, swindle. But certainly, with this VN, I want to aim for a realistic world - not one that is overly dark hopefully! 

 

 

Planescape Torment: One of the best stories people have never heard of. In that universe thoughts are so powerful they shape the planes themselves. People come and dissappear on a whim. Entire worlds are created from the darkess depths of emotions. Doorways to these worlds lead back to where one city can open them all if the correct thought, words, or item associated with those thoughts are held in the right place and time. Sigil is similar to that city you speak of. I suggest playing that game if you haven't to get some good ideas.

Oh! That's interesting Crunchytaco. I've never heard of it but it sounds surprisingly similar to my concept. Thanks for the suggestion.  

 

 

This is indeed a very interesting concept. "If you can create everything, then tell me...can you create this?" will make for a great tagline. However, I feel that you should add a catch to the power of imagination, or maybe some rules. The rules themselves don't need to be clearly stated or specific. The more simple and subtle the restrictions are, the more you get to loop around it to create unexpected twists to surprise the readers. One example I'd like to bring up will be HakoMari. It's a light novel that revolves around a being, 'O', who is a distributor of boxes that grants any one wish perfectly and flawlessly. This makes the readers think that there is no catch to it, that it is unrestricted. However, that is not true. How the author plays around with this idea is that since the box grants wishes with utter completeness, even the user's doubts of whether his wish will come true will also be granted. This allowed plenty of plot twists and the author is a genius at exploiting that. Sorry for the wall of text, you should go read HakoMari if you want to get some amazing ideas. 

Tenkuru, that VN sounds awesome! I absolutely love the idea. I think what you're getting at is the concept of "show, don't tell" where the rules of society (in this case) will be seen by what happens to people/what people can't do even if they try to. 

[Ashadow700]

Sure, sounds like a pretty intriguing premise. I'd be at least willing to give it a try. Still, it of course all about the execution. Even the best of premises can of course be completely thrown if they just aren't pulled off well. (yeah, yeah, obvious fact is obvious)

[laiktail]

Sure, sounds like a pretty intriguing premise. I'd be at least willing to give it a try. Still, it of course all about the execution. Even the best of premises can of course be completely thrown if they just aren't pulled off well. (yeah, yeah, obvious fact is obvious)

Definitely! That's the hardest bit. Everything has got to be top quality. It's expensive, too. Regardless, I'm going to give it my all to make it the best damn Western VN ever.  

[laiktail]

Based on your feedback, everyone, I'm going to go with this general plot premise. I'll keep everyone updated on how things go. it's a really long term project and simultaneously studying Medicine doesn't really help in terms of life being generous with the gift of time. But I'll definitely keep every Fuwanovellian here in the loop.  

(If anyone else wants to leave feedback, I'd still love to hear it!) 

[SanadaShadow]

Hm, so how are people limited?

 

So can this thread be used to submit other ideas as well?

[laiktail]

Hm, so how are people limited?

 

So can this thread be used to submit other ideas as well?

 

Submit away! I'll read everything.

As I've explained in a previous post on this thread: the entire economy runs on people's imaginations. At the same time, it is a limited resource, because imagination takes ones own "mind money" in order to create things. If more people like what you create, then you get more "money" from this, which is how people sustain a living - by creating things that other people like. Identical to real life in a sense, actually, since that's essentially what money is - an object to trade things for other things. But, does that mean if someone has no "money" left, they stop thinking entirely? Nope - they just can't materialize things out of their mind. Masaru could be the exception to that rule, however - thus the reason he never runs out even while his creations proliferate the world. 

This is an extremely rough concept that I literally just came up with after the feedback from here, so I don't know if I'll actually use it or not! I'm sure that there are some gaping plot holes which need to be patched about this system. 

[SanadaShadow]

Well, let Masaru's ability activate and deactivate at random. And maybe possibly make him start out with a fortune he blows off.

[Tenkuru]

Submit away! I'll read everything.

As I've explained in a previous post on this thread: the entire economy runs on people's imaginations. At the same time, it is a limited resource, because imagination takes ones own "mind money" in order to create things. If more people like what you create, then you get more "money" from this, which is how people sustain a living - by creating things that other people like. Identical to real life in a sense, actually, since that's essentially what money is - an object to trade things for other things. But, does that mean if someone has no "money" left, they stop thinking entirely? Nope - they just can't materialize things out of their mind. Masaru could be the exception to that rule, however - thus the reason he never runs out even while his creations proliferate the world. 

This is an extremely rough concept that I literally just came up with after the feedback from here, so I don't know if I'll actually use it or not! I'm sure that there are some gaping plot holes which need to be patched about this system. 

Just something that came up on my mind. Have you watched / read Bakuman? The protagonists wrote a manga called Kono Yo Wa Kane to Chie, and I think it bears a small resemblance to your idea. I don't remember exactly what it was about, but it was something like society ranks people by their intelligence and you can actually buy intelligence from other people? Sorry that I'm not really helping much here. My memories are foggy but it was a really good concept, there was a lot of thinking and mind games involved.

[SanadaShadow]

Well, the "society ranks" thing is a nice choice, but "buying intelligence" is just... Unattractive. As an idea. So, instead of cash, lets call them points. It's just so much less nagging by the OCD stuck in my head constantly telling me to correct spelling mistakes.

[DimDito]

Sounds like something out of Scribblenauts. You can add my Skype because I'm very interested in walking you through this. 

 

I still don't understand how you can translate imagination or cognitive ability into quantity. Be sure to think about this thoroughly, unless you explore every single possibility the universe you've created has to offer, it would make room for copious amounts of plotholes. What happens when someone "runs out of imagination"? How do you "refuel" it?

 

Anyway, I have an idea for a complex protagonist if you're interested;

To make the story deeper, you can make his access to imagination a unique gift. Something only a select few naturally have. The problem is that he hasn't been using it, and the story would center around a certain phenomenon that requires him to make use of his abilities and essentially discover his hidden power of imagination.

 

You can decide whether or not he was aware of this gift, or if he must be told by a supporting character in the beginning of the story. You can also choose to make him a 'bad guy', so once the story happens he is forced to do good. That would make a great character development.

[SanadaShadow]

Oh, you're right! I didn't even make the connection. Ugh.

 

And although the bad guy to good guy thing holds merit, it's still too much of a cliche, and it's one I'm sure won't work well here. Instead, how about looking at good to bad? The transition of a seemingly innocent character into a darker, sentient being.

[DimDito]

...This is beginning to sound awfully familiar.

 

[Tenkuru]

Well, the "society ranks" thing is a nice choice, but "buying intelligence" is just... Unattractive. As an idea. So, instead of cash, lets call them points. It's just so much less nagging by the OCD stuck in my head constantly telling me to correct spelling mistakes.

It was a great concept, really. It's just that my memory is very bad and I'm terrible at explaining it, making it sound very stupid. It's a shame, but I can't really tell you to go watch/read Bakuman, now can I....  

[SanadaShadow]

I movie I've never actually seen before. Stop mocking me.

[SanadaShadow]

It was a great concept, really. It's just that my memory is very bad and I'm terrible at explaining it, making it sound very stupid. It's a shame, but I can't really tell you to go watch/read Bakuman, now can I....  

 

No need, I'm already up to speed with it.

[Flutterz]

I suggest you watch Shinsekai Yori, it has a somewhat similar premise - what would the world be like if people could make their thoughts materialize. Granted, it takes a much darker route than the one you seem to want to take, but it might still give you a few ideas. Not to mention it's a great anime in its own right.