marmoon

Update 2017/03/21: The blurb will get revised based on your feedback!  

Hi Guys,

I have written a short story (10-15k slice of life), and suddenly realised I haven't thought if the premise is good enough! That is why I am mulling in a smack-in-the-face moment and wondering what was I doing with my past two months.

Here's a blurb for the short story:
 


1) Are you interested in the premise? If not, how do you think it can be revved up?
2) Are you interested in the character?
3) Do you think the blurb can be improved? Any suggestions welcomed!
4) Are you interested to be a beta reader of this short story?

Thanks!
-Marmoon

Previous Versions:
1 ----

Update 2017/03/21: The blurb will get revised based on your feedback!  

Hi Guys,

I have written a short story (10-15k slice of life), and suddenly realised I haven't thought if the premise is good enough! That is why I am mulling in a smack-in-the-face moment and wondering what was I doing with my past two months.

Here's a blurb for the short story:
 


1) Are you interested in the premise? If not, how do you think it can be revved up?
2) Are you interested in the character?
3) Do you think the blurb can be improved? Any suggestions welcomed!
4) Are you interested to be a beta reader of this short story?

Thanks!
-Marmoon

Previous Versions:
1 ----