Recruiting Astral Air no Shiroki Towa Translation Project

[Chuee 187]

 

 

Game Information:

http://vndb.org/v12984

http://shinku-translations.net/

http://www.favo-soft.jp/soft/product/WhiteEternity/index.html

 

 

 

Description:

 

For two years now, the city of Tsukigasaki had been stuck in a perpetual state of winter. The snow would fall year-round, but mysteriously not build up, disappearing with a single touch. It was the city where Haruna Riku once lived in his childhood, and the city he returns to years later alongside his partners Hotaru Rinne and Imasaki Hinata. The three of them are what are known as ‘Elfin’, those able to use strange psychic abilities known as ‘Runes’. The director of the Elfin organization they belong to has tasked them with protecting his daughters, Ochiba and Hazuki, who live in Tsukigasaki. In addition, they are also to minimize damage from Runes going out of control, and work to make sure the existence of Elfin isn’t made known to the general public.

Upon arrival, he immediately notices that the city has changed a lot in his time away. Soon after, he meets the girl from his childhood, who mysteriously looks exactly the same as she had when he was a child. The girl, Yuuki, tells him that she’s sad that the city has changed, but that he’ll forever the same to her, even if he’d grown up in their time away.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5l8w6dBvmVA

 

 

 

Progress:

http://shinku-translations.net/progress/

 

 

 

Team:

 

Translation: 

Supreme Tentacle

Editing:

Chuee

Hacking:

Akerou

Image/Video editing:

cry western

 

not recruiting anything atm

 

 

 

FAQ:

 

Q: Partial patch?

 

A: Nope

 

Q: When will this be done?

 

A: Before the coming of Spring. 

 

Q: Which one of these girls is the best?

 

A: The one shorter than 140 cm

[astro 507]

3 TLCs seems a bit excessive, as their job is already the least time-consuming (next to QCs). If I remember correctly, the issue with the last patch wasn't TLC, it was the editing, so you might want to pour more resources into that instead:

 

http://imgur.com/a/QMgjQ

[Chuee 187]

3 TLCs seems a bit excessive, as their job is already the least time-consuming (next to QCs). If I remember correctly, the issue with the last patch wasn't TLC, it was the editing, so you might want to pour more resources into that instead:

 

http://imgur.com/a/QMgjQ

 

I've already gone through the entire common route once and fixed everything grammatical. There's a lot wrong with it translation wise that even someone like me can spot out just using online dictionaries. There were multiple parts where I couldn't even really make out what it was trying to say, and my original TLC flat out found a couple of lines that were completely made up. That's why I ask for 3. TLCing this will require a lot of retranslating and scrutinizing the original text to make sure miniscule details haven't been left out. 

[Zakamutt 1382]

To be completely honest... the translator here is using machine translation. Is there even a point to TLCing it when you can just do a retranslation instead?

[astro 507]

This is why you are supposed to have TL tests.

 

That's why I ask for 3. TLCing this will require a lot of retranslating and scrutinizing the original text to make sure miniscule details haven't been left out. 

So just hire three translators. It makes no sense to keep your current one. From what I've seen of the patch, I'd honestly just trash the entire script and start from scratch.

[Decay 2701]

This is why you are supposed to have TL tests.

 

It's not even a translator he recruited. He's taking a hongfire machine translation and trying to fix it up.

[Darklord Rooke 2172]

Astro's right, you'll probably want to re-translate it. 

 

I've already gone through the entire common route once and fixed everything grammatical. There's a lot wrong with it translation wise that even someone like me can spot out just using online dictionaries. There were multiple parts where I couldn't even really make out what it was trying to say, and my original TLC flat out found a couple of lines that were completely made up. 

 

Also if all you’re doing is fixing grammar then you’re proof-reading. Proofing deals with spelling and grammar, editing deals with all of that + writing style + making certain things can be understood.

 

Also if you edit before you TLC you’ll end up doing double work.

[Zakamutt 1382]

Nah, edit before TLC is standard procedure since editing can potentially distort the meaning etc. That's what TLC is for.. partly.

[Darklord Rooke 2172]

Nah, edit before TLC is standard procedure since editing can potentially distort the meaning etc. That's what TLC is for.. partly.

 

Not according to Raptor.

 

Also editors should be in constant communication with translators to make sure they DON’T distort the meaning. They shouldn’t be editing in a vacuum (unless the editor is also the TLC’er.)

 

The reason you edit after you TLC is because you make sure you get the meaning of the sentence correct before you fiddle with how you express it. If you fiddle with how you express it before you TLC and the TLC’er corrects the meaning of a sentence, then you need to fiddle with it again. Twice the work is not an appealing prospect, especially when it’s time-consuming work. However if you TLC first and you make sure the meaning is correct, then the editor can read through and discuss with the translator how you should be expressing such a sentence once and once only. Neat, simple, and efficient. No going through stuff twice…

 

Also if you edit BEFORE you TLC, you can have instances of the editor scratching their heads because translation errors have added logical inconsistencies that they can’t solve by themselves *points up at Chuee’s post*.

 

I’m talking from past experience as an editor, TLC BEFORE you edit!!! Editors shouldn’t have to be plugging stuff into Translator Aggregator because stuff don’t make sense. You have no idea how much time that consumes.

[Zakamutt 1382]

Also editors should be in constant communication with translators

See, that's not gonna happen in most fan projects. Obviously it's more ideal though, lol. And if you have to plug things into machine tl, that's a terribly literal translator and I'd just walk away from the project most likely...

[Chuee 187]

To be completely honest... the translator here is using machine translation. Is there even a point to TLCing it when you can just do a retranslation instead?

 

Personally I don't really care what's done as long as what I get back doesn't have mistranslations. If the TLC feels like retranslating it would take less time, I have no problem with that.

 

So just hire three translators. It makes no sense to keep your current one. From what I've seen of the patch, I'd honestly just trash the entire script and start from scratch.

 

I'd like to get people to work on the remaining routes if possible and have seperate people look over what I already have. 

 

Astro's right, you'll probably want to re-translate it. 

 

 

Also if all you’re doing is fixing grammar then you’re proof-reading. Proofing deals with spelling and grammar, editing deals with all of that + writing style + making certain things can be understood.

 

Also if you edit before you TLC you’ll end up doing double work.

 

I didn't just proof-read it though. If I could make out what it was saying and it somewhat made sense I'd edit it a bit. If not I'd look at the original text and see if I could figure out what was wrong (most of the time ended up being chosing a bad translation for a certain word in context). If I couldn't then I'd just mark it, explain what didn't make sense and moved on. Oh, and I don't really care about doing double-work, I have plenty of free time. 

[Nashetania 485]

Am I the only one who thinks of this as spin-off from Hoshizora no Memoria? Sure, the story will be different but the characters seem similar (you have imouto, childhood friend, there is deity etc.) and it has enforced playing order too

[Chuee 187]

Am I the only one who thinks of this as spin-off from Hoshizora no Memoria? Sure, the story will be different but the characters seem similar (you have imouto, childhood friend, there is deity etc.) and it has enforced playing order too

 

It's done by the same writer so there's a lot of similar elements. 

[Satsuki 593]

Am I the only one who thinks of this as spin-off from Hoshizora no Memoria? Sure, the story will be different but the characters seem similar (you have imouto, childhood friend, there is deity etc.) and it has enforced playing order too

That's just the basic set of VN heroine, nothing special.

[Chuee 187]

Prologue patch

https://whiteeternity.wordpress.com/2015/02/21/prologue-patch/

[Satsuki 593]

It should be readable now, right?

[Chuee 187]

It should be readable now, right?

 

Yeah, TL should be fairly accurate now as well. 

[XReaper 659]

Am I the only one who thinks of this as spin-off from Hoshizora no Memoria? Sure, the story will be different but the characters seem similar (you have imouto, childhood friend, there is deity etc.) and it has enforced playing order too

 if thats the spinoff, then it goes for nearly every vn out there. not to mention that the actual meaning of spinoff means somehow a continuation of  a previous story or something related to it. but thats only my opinion & i´m pretty drunk every day, so screw what i said

[Satsuki 593]

Just notice something, in the readme you said about updating the game if the voice doesn't work, but that's actually not the game version problem. The patch itself just muted all character voices. Simply turn them back on in the option and it will be fine.

[Chuee 187]

Yeah, that seems to be it. Thanks for pointing that out. 

[periah250 8]

id help but i cant do anything related to translating or modding and also shouldn't we prioritize the games released by this developer before this one? o.O

[Satsuki 593]

id help but i cant do anything related to translating or modding and also shouldn't we prioritize the games released by this developer before this one? o.O

[Chuee 187]

Hoshimemo - Done.

Hoshimemo EH - Translation ongoing.

Iroseka - PJ Dead. People still trying to get contact with the translator, since going through everything from scratch is too painful.

Irohika - No point translating a FD when the main game is not even translated yet.

So, we only have AstralAir left to do.

Favorite's titles before Hoshimemo is not that well-known, so I won't mention them.

 

I don't think there's much point trying to contact the tokidan guy, it's really obvious that something went wrong and he's vanished because of that. Anyways, I'll probably look into doing Irotoridori once this and the upcoming fandisk are done. So basically in a year or two. 

[astro 507]

It should be readable now, right?

I'm scared. You go first

[Satsuki 593]

I'm scared. You go first

Checked. It's fine. Still have typo/grammatical error here and there, but much better than the original one.