madvanced Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Confession: I had my first appointment with the psychologist today. She was a really nice person and great listener too. Surprisingly enough, I actually did get something from our first meeting. Never really thought about it, but the way I handle mental stress is far from ideal. Typically, whenever I think about something negative, I end up making out to be more severe than it actually is. What I never realized was that the situations I was in at the time (even the severe ones) really weren't all that bad. So rather than allow myself to be overwhelmed, I'm gonna try to be more optimistic. I still feel like there are a ways to go for me to make a full recovery, but I'll have 6-8 more sessions with the psychologist, and hopefully I'll be fine after all that is done and over with. At the end of the first session, she handed me a list of questions to ask myself whenever I'm dealing with anxiety, and they're really helpful in getting my thoughts in order. Am I falling into a thinking trap (e.g., catastrophizing or overestimating danger)? What is the evidence that this thought is true? What is the evidence that this thought is not true? Have I confused a thought with a fact? What would I tell a friend if he/she had the same thought? What would a friend say about my thought? Am I 100% sure that _____ will happen? How many times has _____ happened before? Is _____ so important that my future depends on it? What is the worst that can happen? If it did happen, what could I do to cope with or handle it? Is my judgment based on the way I feel instead of facts? Am I confusing "possibility" with "certainty"? It may be possible, but is it likely? Is this a hassle or a horror? And, not too long after my visit, family drama breaks loose again. It's an extremely hectic situation, so I'll refrain from talking about it here, but it was severe enough to push me to my mental limit. Unfortunately, I ended up failing to carry out the practice I mentioned. Because of the severity of the situation, even the list couldn't help me get my thoughts in order and I had another anxiety fit. I had turned to Zealty on Skype, and he was great in helping me cope with the ordeal. When the drama cooled down, I realized that the turnout actually wasn't as severe as I had anticipated and that I should have had more faith in positive thinking. I'm still not entirely confident in my ability to cope with every stressful situation that comes my way, but I'll give it my best shot. I do think I made some progress after today. That's geat news(on the psychologist front).Just don't make the mistake of relying too much on the sessions as a "cure". Ultimately it will always be you who has to deal with whatever comes your way. I had to learn this the hard way. Family dramas can be a huge pain in the ass when anyone is like that(or rather they are bit worse in these cases), having had to deal with my fair share of drama just made me appreciate my alone time a lot more. P.S.- if you are talking to ayana/zealty don't fall for the UM trap Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyrael Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Confession : i wanna know if Tyra knows and uses JV.C lol What Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rinima Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Confession: Lemmasoft is starting to piss me off. I know but I just wanna see this through since she asked me out first Did she actually ask you out or did you misunderstand? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
madvanced Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 I finally got around to making something out of my profile, I'm too lazy for this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Funyarinpa Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Confession: I'd make a montage video of themovie Alien where I'd replace all appearances of the Alien with Shrek but 2skill4me Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zakamutt Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Maybe Tirry's girl is just suffering from extreme social anxiety or something, if you want to pick a generous option. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
madvanced Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Maybe Tirry's girl is just suffering from extreme social anxiety or something, if you want to pick a generous option. He did say that she was very shy, but still she did make him wait for a long time, even me being someone with social anxiety I don't do that. But lets keep Tyrael's hopes up I suppose. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyrael Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Confession: Lemmasoft is starting to piss me off. Did she actually ask you out or did you misunderstand? What's wrong with lemma? And according to my sister and my best friend (also a girl) her messages either meant: A) She was interested in me, or B ) She wanted me to think she was interested in me so I would give her attention Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Poltroon Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 (edited) It's why I consider you to be the epitome of moe on fuwa. I cannot grasp the logic. There must be some, assuredly so, for you're not the first to make such a claim, but I absolutely cannot understand where all this calling me moe comes from... Confession: I had a huge argument with my father today. Which was annoying for all parties involved and, as usual, unnecessary. Details below. Context: I dislike walking the dog. Typically, I have to be told to do so a couple of times before I bother. Occasionally there is some love filled shouting on both sides. My grandparents were scheduled to visit at noon, like they usually do. My grandfather loves walking the dog. I woke up at 11:30 AM. I was asked to walk the dog. I said I'd do so after I took a bath. I went to prepare my clothing for after the bath, as I usually do. I went to have breakfast, as I usually do - in order not to be shouted at, I did not boot up my PC at this point, like I usually do. After finishing breakfast I went to take a bath and found that my father was there instead. I went to my PC as I waited. After he finished I took my own. When I finished dressing up my grandparents arrived. My grandfather always takes the dog out at this point. So I ignored the dog and went to my PC instead. Here's where the issue started. My father shouted at me and told me to walk the dog as I said I would do. I told him there would be no point. He was angry at me for making my grandfather walk the dog, even though he would do so no matter the circumstances. He accused me of stalling so I wouldn't have to walk the dog. It is not unheard of for me to do this, but this time I didn't and a lot of argumenting went on for half an hour. We both were left annoyed and pissed off. For no good reason. Nothing like a healthy family argument~ Edit: We're both adults, by the way. Edited July 3, 2015 by Tiagofvarela Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rinima Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 What's wrong with lemma? And according to my sister and my best friend (also a girl) her messages either meant: A) She was interested in me, or B) She wanted me to think she was interested in me so I would give her attention I feel like I'm told off for every little thing (I dared to ask a question today). Out of interest, what did she say? Stuff like that is easily misinterpreted Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kurisu-Chan Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Confession : i want to date Rinima. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
madvanced Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 I feel like I'm told off for every little thing (I dared to ask a question today). Out of interest, what did she say? Stuff like that is easily misinterpreted Just don't make the mistake of asking about ballpens. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rinima Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Confession : i want to date Rinima. Sweet of you but no thanks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
madvanced Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Confession : i want to date Rinima. kuu you're a tsundere, therefore does that mean that you want to date someone else but you are just not being honest? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cyrillej1 Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Did she actually ask you out or did you misunderstand? And according to my sister and my best friend (also a girl) her messages either meant: A) She was interested in me, or B ) She wanted me to think she was interested in me so I would give her attention I was thinking the same thing, wondering if she actually asked you out Tyr. Sometimes girls just want to be friends ya know~ and have someone to hang out with. I guess if I read the email, maybe I'd get a better sense of her intention (not that I'm asking to~). Confession: I've been told before, that I come off pretty aggressive when pursuing friendship with males . Gah, I once asked a male friend of mine before, what would make him think a girl is interested (dating)? And his reply was, "just talking to me" ...lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
madvanced Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 I was thinking the same thing, wondering if she actually asked you out Tyr. Sometimes girls just want to be friends ya know~ and have someone to hang out with. I guess if I could read the email, maybe I'd get a better sense of her intention (not that I'm asking to~). Confession: I've been told before, that I come off pretty aggressive when pursuing friendship with males . Gah, I once asked a male friend of mine before, what would make him think a girl is interested (dating)? And his reply was, "just talking to me" ...lol. Well normally people especially those of the oposite sex don't just go off and start talking with you(unless they are put in a position to do so, so it is situational to a certain extent), so a lot of times that can be seen as someone having a "special" interest regarding the person they are interacting with. But that all comes down to how you normally view things I suppose. For example I don't normally assume that a girl might be interested in me in a romantic way just because she started to talk to me, but if she displays enough interest to want to communicate more and more I might start to implant that idea in my head for whatever reason. Then again I'm the type of person that usually doesn't maintain huge amounts of communications, because I'm just not up to talking all the time. Introvertedness I guess. Cyrillej1 and Rinima 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cyrillej1 Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Well normally people especially those of the oposite sex don't just go off and start talking with you(unless they are put in a position to do so, so it is situational to a certain extent), so a lot of times that can be seen as someone having a "special" interest regarding the person they are interacting with. But that all comes down to how you normally view things I suppose. For example I don't normally assume that a girl might be interested in me in a romantic way just because she started to talk to me, but if she displays enough interest to want to communicate more and more I might start to implant that idea on my head for whatever reason. Then again I'm the type of person that usually doesn't maintain huge amounts of communications, because I'm just not up to talking all the time. Introvertedness I guess. That's where it gets tricky, when a guy-girl become closer friends. I tend to want to talk to my friends.. because they are my friends. xD But yeah... I admit, I can have poor boundaries when it comes to my friendships with males. I think part could be due to me growing up with a lot of boys in my family, so I'm just more comfortable and tend to have more nerdy things in common too (like video-gaming). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
madvanced Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 That's where it gets tricky, when a guy-girl become closer friends. I tend to want to talk to my friends.. because they are my friends. xD But yeah... I admit, I can have poor boundaries when it comes to my friendships with males. I think part could be due to me growing up with a lot of boys in my family, so I'm just more comfortable and tend to have more nerdy things in common too (like video-gaming). Well as for me it's because I haven't really had any prolonged friendships with females(other than a rare exception) so that's the reason that in my case it might happen. So it's more about lack of experience than anything, so I can't speak for other people. That female RL friend that I just mentioned for example although she did try to talk to me whenever she could I never got that romantic interest mindset. Bah I'm just weird I guess. rainsismyfav 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Funyarinpa Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Confession: I'm pretty sure my relationship with my little sister is fucked up (and no sort of oedipal dilemma is present, before anyone asks) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
madvanced Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Confession: I'm pretty sure my relationship with my little sister is fucked up (and no sort of oedipal dilemma is present, before anyone asks) tch, here I was thinking that I could take it the wrong way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyrael Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 I was thinking the same thing, wondering if she actually asked you out Tyr. Sometimes girls just want to be friends ya know~ and have someone to hang out with. I guess if I read the email, maybe I'd get a better sense of her intention (not that I'm asking to~). Confession: I've been told before, that I come off pretty aggressive when pursuing friendship with males . Gah, I once asked a male friend of mine before, what would make him think a girl is interested (dating)? And his reply was, "just talking to me" ...lol. Well the conversation was in dutch but here's the gist of it: Her: Hey! We haven't spoken in a long time, have we? How have you been? I heard you're in uni now, how's that going? ... Oh, that's great! When are your exams ending? Maybe we can meet up after? Anyways, good luck with your exams, I'm sure you'll do great! ... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Poltroon Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Confession: I'm pretty sure my relationship with my little sister is fucked up (and no sort of oedipal dilemma is present, before anyone asks) Is that so? Mine are pretty much fine except the younger one is starting to learn from the older one and actually inflict physical pain upon my person. Something, I might add, that I do not approve of. I cannot, however, call them unprovoked attacks due to circumstances completely outside my control. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rinima Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 Well the conversation was in dutch but here's the gist of it: Her: Hey! We haven't spoken in a long time, have we? How have you been? I heard you're in uni now, how's that going? ... Oh, that's great! When are your exams ending? Maybe we can meet up after? Anyways, good luck with your exams, I'm sure you'll do great! ... That sounds more like a friendly get together to me :/ It's the sort of thing I'd send to one on my male friends, but I don't know this chick so Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kenshin_sama Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 That's geat news(on the psychologist front).Just don't make the mistake of relying too much on the sessions as a "cure". Ultimately it will always be you who has to deal with whatever comes your way. I had to learn this the hard way. Family dramas can be a huge pain in the ass when anyone is like that(or rather they are bit worse in these cases), having had to deal with my fair share of drama just made me appreciate my alone time a lot more. P.S.- if you are talking to ayana/zealty don't fall for the UM trap I know. It's a personal problem, and I have to be the one willing to make the change. But don't worry, I didn't sign up for this just to laze off and let the specialists handle things, I did it to get a shove in the right direction. Your concern is appreciated though. Yeah, alone time is pretty sacred to me now too. I've fallen into the trap of wanting to help other people when they don't ask for it on numerous occasions, but I learned the hard way that doing so will always have the opposite of the intended effect. So rather than force my involvement, I just steer clear of the whole thing, do whatever it is I'm doing on the computer, and keep my sound-blocking headphones on (I'm so happy I have these). It's not easy when you're the type to care about other people, but it can't be helped. I fell into that trap before he did. UM is one hell of a drug. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Milk Tea Posted July 3, 2015 Share Posted July 3, 2015 tch, here I was thinking that I could take it the wrong way. Our hopes were shot down ne... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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