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Mikanmeister

Pure x Connect Translation [Prologue and UI patch released]

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Not a bit harder, but it means you need to completely rewrite some scenes that often appear in moe games. Like aforementioned Haruka ni Aogi:

美綺: 「センセとアタシは友達なんだからさ、もっとさ親しい感じで呼んでよ」

司: 「吐き捨てるように呼び捨てか!?」

美綺: 「美綺でも、みさきちでも、みさきちゃんでも、みさみさでも、みさぴょんでも、好きなよーに」

美綺と呼ぶのはちょっとはばかられたし、かと言って美綺さんもかしこまりすぎてた。

司: 「呼び捨てとみさみさはちょっと……。みさぴょんもそういうあだ名のダチがいるんで」

美綺: 「うーん、しょうがないなぁ。じゃあみさきちかみさきちゃん、さぁどっちか選んで選んで」

Not to mention that Sensei is a huge fetish word in the context of the game.

Second thing are the name, you’ve got scenes where character stop calling each other by their family names and start using given names instead. You can look at moenovel’s rewrite of such a scene here:

https://imgur.com/a/16b6Oa8

 

You already have capitalization problems and a gross mischaracterization in the first few lines of the prologue - the girl on the phone says (電話を)切るわよ as in hang up, but it’s translated as “I’ll stab you.”

I noticed that MC’s name is used very scarcely just like in fureraba. Yet Ayumi is forced to use it pretty often because every instance of “Onii-san” is translated to name. And she does still use Onii-san even during H-scenes - I checked.

My point is that rewriting is a ridiculous thing to do. You’re changing the original intent because of stubbornness.

Edited by Merkom

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Okay, so started playing a bit.

As expected, the editing/QC quality is nothing to write home about. As for translation accuracy, I can't really judge that, but as far as "making sense" goes, it looks okay. The "no honorifics" style isn't really a problem for me, so I'd say this passes as a bare minimum translation.

10 hours ago, Merkom said:

You already have capitalization problems and a gross mischaracterization in the first few lines of the prologue - the girl on the phone says (電話を)切るわよ as in hang up, but it’s translated as “I’ll stab you.”

Oh, yeah, there's an abundance of capitalization issues. Not just at beginning of sentences, but simple stuff like "Christmas", "Dad", "Mom", etc. got ignored too. The editor is a bit lacking. As for the girl on the phone... yeah, I know which line you are talking about. In fact, I understood it as "I'll kill you", not "I'll stab you" xD ... I was judging that by the VA's voice, not the JP line (I don't have the JP script yet). I assumed she used "kill" as a loan word, but now I see I was wrong based on your interpretation.

Anyway... not the best of fanTLs, but I wasn't expecting anything amazing. I'd say this passes as a bare minimum. The TL, while a bit spiritless for my tastes, and editing/QC issues aside, seems readable. I heard Fureraba by NekoNyan also had tons of QC issues, so it's not like anyone should expect from fanTLs to be better in that regard.

I can only wish them good luck and to finish this project in good health. I have to admit - I am a sucker for SMEE. I only read one work fully by them, and while I must admit it was pretty mediocre as far as moeges go, I enjoyed it a lot. Pure X Connect has high production values, so I think I can definitely enjoy it just as much, if not even more than that other SMEE VN. I actually think I'll read it in JP. From the parts I've seen so far, it doesn't seem to be a difficult VN to read in JP.

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Considering how most people feel about it, work will start on making a patch using honorifics and rewriting scenes that had been adapted to make sense without using them, It'll be posted here when it's ready.

@Merkom Oh yeah, you are right, that line was definitely a mistake on my part, I'll fix it on both versions of the patch.

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Thanks for listening. I think that’s very rare these days. Bless you. Once you do this for the prologue, I can read through the whole thing and send you a PM with other mistakes I find.

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On 6/4/2019 at 8:13 AM, tenshi25 said:

Status update

Overall progress:

Translation: 7205/43896

Editing:        3825/43896

Thanks for the update, Keep up the good work! :)

Edited by Red_Rain77

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Y'all still need someone to do some Image Editing? I could help pretty regularly.

Below are one of my most recent work on (エデンズリッター 淫悦の聖魔騎士ルシフェル編)

Spoiler

NyZgjOt.pnguWmeOyt.png

v1TFN1x.pngpVlT6Mo.png

 

Let me know~

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Apparently only the chosen one that can see the updates, so since we're not the chosen one unfortunately we can't see the update here and so we can only see the same number from a month ago.

Seriously if you didn't have the update here I would be appreciate you if you didn't post the same update at all. I know that sometimes real life could get in the way of the translation work, so it's understandable if you didn't always manage to get a single line of progress for a month. So if you didn't manage to get the progress, I would suggest you to not post the update. Honestly it's very disappointing that I expect a new progress when I saw a new post from the translator in here only to have the unchanging progress, so hopefully you didn't repeat the mistake in the future.

Edited by littleshogun

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4 hours ago, littleshogun said:

Apparently only the chosen one that can see the updates, so since we're not the chosen one unfortunately we can't see the update here and so we can only see the same number from a month ago.

Seriously if you didn't have the update here I would be appreciate you if you didn't post the same update at all. I know that sometimes real life could get in the way of the translation work, so it's understandable if you didn't always manage to get a single line of progress for a month. So if you didn't manage to get the progress, I would suggest you to not post the update. Honestly it's very disappointing that I expect a new progress when I saw a new post in here only to have the unchanging progress, so hopefully you didn't repeat the mistake in the future.

Umm... Shogun?
Is everything okay with you? I didn't expect you to write such a butthurt post.

He's pretty much posting an update every month or so here, even if there's no progress to be shown. I don't think anyone should be angry over it. I take this as "there has been no progress, but we are still alive". No reason to be disrespectful toward the team like that.

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19 hours ago, Infernoplex said:

Umm... Shogun?
Is everything okay with you? I didn't expect you to write such a butthurt post.

He's pretty much posting an update every month or so here, even if there's no progress to be shown. I don't think anyone should be angry over it. I take this as "there has been no progress, but we are still alive". No reason to be disrespectful toward the team like that.

I'm sorry about my outburst here, so let me try to explain it. Actually I would be okay if he just post the editing progress here, and besides if he want to say that (there has been no progress, but we are still alive) then I prefer him to just saying it directly instead of post the same progress (Besides two weeks is still not warranted enough to make people think that it's already dead). Honestly back when I saw this I'm quite happy to expect that I'm finally be able to see the progress, only to see the same progress here. So yeah I'm very disappointed here, and besides even without the translation progress we always can see the editing progress so at least I'm quite thankful even if just showed that (The editing progress).

Okay before it got worse, let me say that I apologize to the team here if I'm sounds rude here. Although my point is still clear though in that the translator can just say it directly if he's been busy for two weeks here.

Edited by littleshogun

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5 hours ago, littleshogun said:

I'm sorry about my outburst here, so let me try to explain it. Actually I would be okay if he just post the edited progress here, and besides if he want to say that then I prefer him to just saying it directly instead of post the same progress (Besides two weeks is still not warranted enough to make people think that it's already dead). Honestly back when I saw this I'm quite happy to expect that I'm finally be able to see the progress, only to see the same progress here. So yeah I'm very disappointed here, and besides even without that we always can see the editing progress so at least I'm quite thankful even if he showed some editing progress.

Okay before it got worse, let me say that I apologize to the team here if I'm sounds rude here. Although my point is still clear though in that the translator can just say it directly if he's been busy for two weeks directly here.

I'm sure your aplogy are accept and i understand what you mean.

I'm sure he would come online and explain everything when he it's not busy.

 

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