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Just some advice on translating honorifics in Arcana... This time Caprese has gone to a large town where the concert of a famous singer named Silvia is going to take place. Being a traveller he has no idea what is going on, and asks a passing man about it:

 

Man: なんだよ、知らないのかよ、今日はシルビアちゃんのコンサートだろ?

Caprese: シルビア?

Man: なんだいなんだい、お前、どこの田舎もんだよ? シルビアちゃん、知らないって?まさか山にこもってたわけじゃないよな?

Caprese: じゃ、今日、そのシルビアのコンサートがあるんだ?

Man: シルビアちゃん!だろ!!ったく...

 

The man calls her 'Silvia-chan' and chides Caprese when he elides the -chan. If the setting was in a Japanese context I would be perfectly content to leave the -chan as is, but since Arcana is taking place in a fantasy world I feel this ought to be adapted, in the same way honorific expressions like ハープ様 might become "her/your Highness (Harp)" rather than just 'Harp-sama' and 法王様 could translate to something like 'his/your Holiness (the Hierophant)'.

 

So the above conversation might become:

 

Man: What, you didn't know? Today is the day of Miss Silvia's concert!

Caprese: Silvia?

Man: Hey, hey, what sort of country yokel are you? You really don't know Miss Silvia? Have you been living in the mountains like a hermit or something?

Caprese: So there's a concert of that Silvia today?

Man: That's Miss Silvia to you! Oh man...

 

I wonder if there's a better way of translating the diminutive -chan than that.

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Just some advice on translating honorifics in Arcana... This time Caprese has gone to a large town where the concert of a famous singer named Silvia is going to take place. Being a traveller he has no idea what is going on, and asks a passing man about it:

 

Man: なんだよ、知らないのかよ、今日はシルビアちゃんのコンサートだろ?

Caprese: シルビア?

Man: なんだいなんだい、お前、どこの田舎もんだよ? シルビアちゃん、知らないって?まさか山にこもってたわけじゃないよな?

Caprese: じゃ、今日、そのシルビアのコンサートがあるんだ?

Man: シルビアちゃん!だろ!!ったく...

 

The man calls her 'Silvia-chan' and chides Caprese when he elides the -chan. If the setting was in a Japanese context I would be perfectly content to leave the -chan as is, but since Arcana is taking place in a fantasy world I feel this ought to be adapted, in the same way honorific expressions like ハープ様 might become "her/your Highness (Harp)" rather than just 'Harp-sama' and 法王様 could translate to something like 'his/your Holiness (the Hierophant)'.

 

So the above conversation might become:

 

Man: What, you didn't know? Today is the day of Miss Silvia's concert!

Caprese: Silvia?

Man: Hey, hey, what sort of country yokel are you? You really don't know Miss Silvia? Have you been living in the mountains like a hermit or something?

Caprese: So there's a concert of that Silvia today?

Man: That's Miss Silvia to you! Oh man...

 

I wonder if there's a better way of translating the diminutive -chan than that.

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the thing is the chan doesnt mean miss, in fact it is used when someone is close to you so adding the miss just changes the whole meaning of that dialog.

going with dofolw's solution seems like it's the easiest way to fix all those honorific and pronouns problems, no matter the circumstance you can always go for that solution (I don't like it but I actually can't think of any other way)

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店長さんは、優しく俺の手を持って、その鍵を手のひらに 載せ、両手で包み込むように握らせる。

I know perfectly well what she's doing, I can even picture it. I just can't find proper english words to describe this (well, I can, but it's so awfully literal (´; ω ;`) )

Help, pls (´; ω ;`)

 

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  • 2 weeks later...

I've been doing a second-pass check of my translations of Arcana and found a rather curious word that appears at least twice, and it seems that both times I was unable to translate it properly: 力抜く. The first part means strength/power, while the second part is a verb that means to extract/omit/draw out. The obvious meaning is to draw out one's strength, but in the two very different contexts in which it appears it seems perplexing, so perhaps there's an idiom here I'm not quite getting.

 

Anyway, the first context is that Caprese has managed to rescue a girl named Animato and is about to actually have sex with her (§1.3.5):

 

Caprese: アニー…ほら、\n足を開いて…\n入れるよ…

Animato: カプリス…やっぱり…\nはいんないよ…そんなの…

Caprese: 大丈夫だよ…力抜いて

 

I take Caprese's meaning here as he's going to be gentle as he does it (lit. restrain his strength) or that he'll not shoot his load inside her.

 

These words appear again in a totally different context when Caprese and his fairy companion Primo arrive at the prosperous city ruled by Lady Amoroso (§1.4.1), and Primo asks him to explain what is meant by 'commerce' (交易):

 

Caprese: そうすると商人が集まってきて、\n交易で栄えるってわけ

Primo: なぁるほどぉ…で、交易って?

Caprese: もう…いい…力抜けた

 

This time the same words seem to be used to express Caprese's exasperation at Primo's request for an explanation of such a basic concept, lit. all his strength has been drawn out.

 

Is my understanding correct? I can't help but feel that I'm missing something here.

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I'm having hard time to translate this one, what does "バチ" means? I searched it but it gives different answers.

Miya:「もっとこうしていたい、なんて思ったら、きっとバチが当たってしまいますね」

そう言って寂しそうに笑う顔を見ると、胸がぎりぎりと痛んでくる。

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バチ=罰

Something along the lines of retribution, punishment, etc.
I'd totally go liberal on it and go with something like,
"Would it be too selfish to want to stay like this for a while?"
Seeing her sad smile strangled my heart painfully.

"It would be too selfish for me to ask to stay like this"
"I'd be punished if I should ask to stay like this longer"
More literal, but it doesn't really feel fitting.

Edited by storyteller
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Some more translation advice... Here's the context. So this time Caprese has abandoned Primo (either because the Meister banished her or he left her behind), and has entered a red light district although he doesn't realise it's that sort of place as he is exhausted and weary after leaving the battlefield in the previous chapter. A kind-hearted stripper encourages him to enter her tavern and a man strikes up a conversation with him:

Man: 兄さん、見ない顔だね

Caprese: ああ…今日この街に来た

Man: そうかい?お目当ては決まってるのかい?

Caprese: お目当て?

Man: とぼけるなって。どこの店だ?

Caprese: いや、ほんとにわからないんだけど…

I'm not quite sure how to properly translate お目当て in this case. I know it means a sort of purpose, intention, or sight, and so it seems to me that the man is making a sort of euphemism, obliquely hinting at Caprese's interest in the sort of entertainment the tavern provides. My rough translation:

Man: My man, haven't seen you around here before.

Caprese: yeah.. I just came into this quarter today.

Man: Oh really, so your interests swing this way, huh?

Caprese: My interests?

Man: Don't play dumb. You know what sort of establishment this is?

Caprese: No, I really don't know but...

Not so sure if that's the best way to translate お目当て though.

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お目当て in these cases, I believe, usually refers to a specific prostitute. Basically, "Do you have a prostitute in mind?"
Either that, or seeing as the man follows it up with どこの店だ? he's asking Caprese which brothel he planned to 'relieve' himself at.

Edited by storyteller
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Thanks, that seems to be right, as the same word appears again with that meaning. Later, when the show starts the girl he met (named Litania) is on stage, and that guy Caprese is talking to says the following:

ほう、リタニアを知ってるのかい?\nさては彼女がお目当てか?やめとけよ、忠告するぜ

"Oh, so you know Litania? She's the one you had your eye on? Word of advice, don't go near her."

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Can someone help me with the bolded word in this line?

柔らかな幼曲美を描く涼海のお尻にも、るあと同じように男の肥大した肉棒が根元まで抽挿を繰り返す

I feel like it might be describing the circle the anus makes when there's a penis in it.

Edit: Wait, nvm nvm! I think it's just describing the gap between the buttocks. Oh jeez...

If it's not appropriate, please let me know! :o

Edited by RaurosFalls
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I'm translating the conversation between the exotic dancer Litania and the vagabond Caprese in Arcana (§3.9.2 Light Arc) and I'm running into grammatical structures that are rather unfamiliar to my JLPT3-level Japanese (or maybe I should be ashamed of myself for having forgotten so much). Context is basically that Litania has encouraged him to enter her bar after seeing him slumped and exhausted at the entrance, and after her she's done dancing, she takes him up to her room. Oddly enough, unlike the other dancers at her bar she doesn't engage in prostitution. They have the following conversation:

Litania: これでも酒場で酔っぱらいの前で腰振ってるのよ?なにか、辛いことがあったんだ?

Caprese: なんで、酒場の女はこうずけずけと…

Litania: そう?話せば楽になることもあるし、人前で落ち込んでみせるのって、かまって欲しいってサインでもあるのよ?

In the first part it seems Litania is saying something to the effect that she spends her nights shaking her ass in front of drunkards in the bar, and sometimes it's hurtful. Caprese then seems to be wondering why a bargirl would speak so bluntly about such things. Her reply though completely defies all my efforts to parse it.

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Litania: I spend my nights shaking my butt (dancing) in front of drunkards, you know? Is something on your mind?

Seeing as the first sentence and second have little to do with each other, I'm guessing it has something to do with the line previous.

Caprese: Why is it you barmaids (? women working at bars? Woman in bars? Not sure what the correct equivalent here is.) are so unreserved/frank/blunt talking about these things?

Litania: Are we? You might feel a little better just by talking about it, and besides, don't you know that acting despondent in front of others is like sending a sign that you want them to care?

Edited by storyteller
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Thanks, that makes sense and clears up a lot of the rest of the conversation besides. The immediate previous topic of their conversation was about Caprese's reluctance to take liquor or any alcoholic beverages. Further relevant context is that in §1.3.3 Caprese runs into a gang of brigands running a protection racket on a village who have been given a girl named Animato as tribute. He plays a drinking game with the brigands in an attempt to save her, and it seems ever since that incident (whether he succeeded in saving Animato or not) he would never drink liquor again. Evidently it seems she's trying to get him to tell her about that incident. Here's some more of the previous context:

Caprese: どうして、そんなに俺のことを聞くんだ?

Litania: どうしてかしらねぇ?お酒でも飲んで考えれば?

Caprese: だから酒は…

Litania: 飲めないと言うよりも、飲まない、でしょ?これも図星だ

Caprese: なんで…

Litania: そんな顔してれば、何かあったんだろうなくらいわかるわよ。

My rough translation:

Caprese: Why do you want to know about me so much?

Litania: Why indeed? If you think of drinking liquor—

Caprese: But liquor...

Litania: I see, rather than can't drink, it's more like won't drink, no? It seems I guessed right.

Caprese: Why...

Litania: If you make such a face, something is bound to happen, you know.

I suppose it's because Caprese came to the tavern looking so depressed that he caught Litania's attention. So the rest of the text would then translate like this perhaps?

Litania: I spend my nights at the bar shaking my ass in front of drunkards, see? Is something troubling you?

Caprese: Why are you bargirls so blunt...

Litania: Are we? You might feel a little better just by talking about it, and besides, don't you know that acting despondent in front of others is like sending a sign that you want them to care?

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Caprese: Why do you want to know about me so much?

Litania: Why indeed? If you think of drinking liquor—
The second half is telling him to thinking about it while having a drink.
Probably something along the lines of "Why don't you have a drink (while you think about it)?" is more appropriate.

Caprese: But liquor...
I don't know how well this makes sense to the ears of others. I might have gone with "No... no liquor"

Litania: I see, rather than can't drink, it's more like won't drink, no? It seems I guessed right.
Maybe "Aha, bull's eye"? Minor point.

Caprese: Why...
"How...?" is more appropriate here.

Litania: If you make such a face, something is bound to happen, you know.
Its not that "something is bound to happen", rather, "anyone can tell something had happened".
Maybe "Anyone could tell you're hiding something when you make a face like that, you know?"

I suppose it's because Caprese came to the tavern looking so depressed that he caught Litania's attention. So the rest of the text would then translate like this perhaps?

Litania: I spend my nights at the bar shaking my ass in front of drunkards, see? Is something troubling you?
Specifically, "What is it (about liquors) that troubles you?" She's more or less asking for the specific incident at this point.

Caprese: Why are you bargirls so blunt...
"so... blunt?" feels a little more appropriate. Nitpick.

Litania: Are we? You might feel a little better just by talking about it, and besides, don't you know that acting despondent in front of others is like sending a sign that you want them to care?
I know this was my line, but there has got to be a better flowing word here than "despondent"

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Edited by storyteller
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To expand on what Storyteller's said:

For lines 2& 3: consider: "But I can't... " / "It's less that you can't drink and more that you won't, right?" Here, consider what would be the first word in the English translation, were Caprese's line stated in full. In Japanese, it's 酒が飲めない; in English, "I can't drink alcohol."

I would really, really recommend translating the 辛いことがあった bit as "Something bad happened, right" in this context. "What is it about alcohol that troubles you" (using liquor in this context sounds weird to my (American) ears; is that standard in British English?) feels like you're asking why you don't like e.g. the feeling of being buzzed.

For the last line, perhaps "[...]moping about is the same as asking everyone to pity you"?

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Well, I've managed to putter through the next chapter, where Caprese meets a woman named Passepied who seems to have lost her husband in a battle with the infidels, and cannot accept this fact. After Caprese figures out part of the mystery, he has a conversation with the demonic fairy Dominante:

Dominante: あのまま死霊と一緒になっても良かったんじゃない?

Caprese: …かもしれないな…

Dominante: あったまきた!

What in the world is this last thing Dominante said?

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