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Neo4114

Breakup help

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So me and my ex broke up Dec. 2014. I found out in Feb that she has sex with my best friend that i had known for nine years. One month after the break up. All while I was going to him for advice almost everyday. So i found out and cut them both off. But even now still i really accidentally (no lie) read her twitter for the first time and its all bashing me still. She goes on to say anything between "i hope your birthday is the most miserable day of your life"  (Bday is within a week) to "what was i thinking dating you".  Now i am not the type of guy to say anything back, as i dont want to feed the fire. But i cant lie, the words hurt.  Now i dont want to be with her even but Even after all she did to me, i still wish her the best. She acts like she wants me dead. Now i wasn't the best boyfriend, but i don't think i deserved that.  How would you guys try to handle the situation. Any advice is welcomed. 

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Fuwa becoming a dating site is becoming more of a reality.

How to handle this situation? I don't know, if you have no interest in her just block her on every media outlet?

She can't badmouth you forever so just focus on other things, it'll make you feel better.

If you try to get back at her you'll just generate more hatred and people like that really aren't worth the effort.

Same thing to getting back at your ex friend.

Just forget about people like this.

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Fuwa becoming a dating site is becoming more of a reality.

 

It would make things easier but more complex at the same time.  At the very least it would give people the experience to do better, though the aftermath has potential to be confusing.

 

As for Neo, firstly I'll apologize for how crazy recent stuff is, breakups are hard enough as-is.  I'd cut off contact as-usual where others have said, block said people as well especially if they're effectively harassing you.  Find something to occupy your mind with, I'd say.  One route is to go for the kind of mind-blowing stuff that refuses to leave your mind, be it anime or VNs.  Another is to go for something long that you can rush through something long that you can get through - Episode 8 of Umineko's VN was what I ended up turning to.

 

There's also the whole argument of whether or not it's a good idea to jump right back into the dating pool, since someone may or may not be a bit unwell from the experience, but it's a more complicated subject than I can say to understand.  Find something to occupy yourself, block off the exes/harassment agents if at all possible.  Good luck.

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To use a bit of a crude analogy, some people are like cancer. The only way you can get better is by cutting them and everything they've spread to out and hoping they never return (or poisoning yourself and hoping they die first, but that doesn't really work with people). So block them everywhere you can, if possible try to avoid places where you know you'll meet them, and find something to occupy yourself and your mind in the meantime.

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Thanks so much guys, i have been dealing with this for a while, and honestly is just getting exhausting. you guys are 100% right in i should just continue to ignore and block. its reassuring to have you guys all say to do that.  Its just that seeing how she could say those things about me really brought up sadness. Like i said i was not the greatest BF, but nothing to deserve that. As far as the dating pool, i will definitely wait it out. I want to be in another relationship, but right now i am just trying to fill a void, not be committed to the person. This was my first real relationship, so i don't know how to handle the situation. Thanks again peeps.

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Not sure if sarcasm or nor, but just to make sure, he meant he was friends with that person for 9 years, not that his friend is 9 years old.

 

 

She's a pedo! You should denounce her to the police! (Why didn't you yet?)

 

I am currently 18, i knew my friend since he was 9. Hence, the friendship was for 9 years. They were both 18.

Sorry for that, ill definitely clear that up

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Sorry to hear... Because you're having a hard time to move on, unlike her, that pretty much means you're more human and perhaps better raised than she is.

 

I went through a troubling break up a few months ago too, and it's a pain, I know... It took me a month or two to get used to it, But moving on was really the only and best thing to do and it's what I'd suggest you try too. It may take a while for your mind to adjust, but find things you love doing and you will eventually end up feeling better. Someone much better than her might enter your life if you give it time.

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1.  Read lilith VNs

2.  Copy-pasta her face over the heroines' mentally. 

3.  Enjoy

 

This is a simple, otaku-like solution to all bad girlfriends. 

 

Edit:  I also have solutions for females with a-hole ex-boyfriends, lol.

 

Edit2: Incidentally, I'm not joking.  There is nothing quite like pasting someone you don't like onto an enemy's face in an fps or on a heroine's face in a rapegame to relieve the rage without actually going out and doing something to them.  Giving into the urge to bash them right back is a waste of time and energy, because people like that are too stupid to realize they are worthless lumps of human garbage.

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read, a book a vn, doesnt matter what but read something, or watch a tv series, play a video game, keep your head occupied and stop thinking about her, I know it's hard but the more you think about it the harder it will take you to forget her :/ and stop looking her tweeter or facebook you will only hurt yourself by doing so.

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Thank you all for your tips. Also shout out to Clephas for making me laugh at Work :). At this point i want to move on, hell i thought i did. But i regressed when i saw those comments. It bothers me that people say things just to intentionally hurt someone else, even though we loved each other at one point.  Seriously guys, thanks for every comment, makes me feel less lonely.

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Don't worry about it.  Also, I was being deadly serious.  It also helps if you realize that there will always be times when people you cared about don't share those feelings or that their feelings get reversed surprisingly easily.  Thinking rationally about relationships is usually the best thing to do, but most people can't do it.  I mean, I abandoned human company simply because I got tired of having to deal with this kind of crap.  It really sucks to be the calm one in a breaking down relationship, because it lets you see all the ugliness without the buffer of your own anger, sorrow, and hate.  However, it also means you don't have any lingering attachment when it is over, lol. 

 

Also, not having a girlfriend means it is easier to save for retirement, lol.

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Anyone who would go that far to be hateful, and do spiteful things like that, aren't the kind of people you should waste time thinking or caring about. Karma usually has a way of catching up with them in the end.

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Anyone who would go that far to be hateful, and do spiteful things like that, aren't the kind of people you should waste time thinking or caring about. Karma usually has a way of catching up with them in the end.

 

I was thinking the same thing, doesn't make me feel better though. But glad i don't have to change myself to get even with her.

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