Zucco

Looks fun. I'm in.

About the length of the series, it's fine by me! You should already know that it's gonna take a long time to complete tough, and since a lot can happen in that time, I cannot promise i'll stay until the end. Having said that, I'm having fun right know, so I'll stick around for a while! Thanks!

Okami's description is similar to what I imagined too... And that second digging machine actually looks pretty fun to draw! (I agree that the other two would be hard tough.... But we could always reduce the amount of details.) About Akeno's design, #4 is the one I liked the most,but I was thinking of making one more attempt using a hairstyle similar to this before making the final decision. Edit: By the way, I wanted to ask this for a while, but... Volume 4? How long is a volume? And how long are you planning this series to be, Okami? Sorry, in the end I got hooked to another manga the last few days and did not spend much time drawing. Well, here is the updated picture of the children:

haha, I'm glad we wont have two members away from the project becouse of computer problems. Indead it would be helpful if the people writing the story described some details about where it takes place... About the digging site, since its in the middle of neutral territory I had imagined it as being in a small town (or close to a small town) surrounded by desert. By the way, it might be a little different from what I had in mind for this manga, but when it comes to futuristic backgrounds you should take a look at Tsutomu Nihei's drawings!

Well... the first scenes are set in 2141, in a digging site in neutral territory. I think a full page drawing of the bus reaching the building site (in wich you could get a good view of the site, of course) would be nice. Wheter it's drawn as an overview, or as the view of a person of normal height walking toward the site is up to you. Also, if you want to do the concepts for the places that appear in the first chapter (the digging site, it's residences and caves in neutral territory, and the town of Yorkwing and the village of Vileor, both close to Midoristal's border) or any other places that appear in the story, it would be helpful! On how to draw it... It would be nice if a different architectural style as used for each of the three factions. I was thinking of giving a oriental feel to Raepista, but have not discussed it in detail. When asked about the Sci-fi elements, Okami answered that: "For Sci/Fi elements I would say that moustly weapons, military equipment and military facilities would have that Sci/fi element to them (but not as far as giant robots and laser guns). And you could feel that there is that Sci/fi element to cities, houses and places (but once again I wouldn't go too far with it, more like different than now but not too far into the future). Also if possible I would add royalty into a society." I agree with him, but personally i think it could be interesting to go a bit over the top in the richest parts of the cities (especially the capitals) and in the noble residences. This is probably not very important at this point, but he also said "I thought about adding a neutral town too, just true, I thought of making it into poor town where people who were banished from their factions live and making it into some kind of cyberpunk style (true that part is still in progres).!" I will post what we have on the first chapter bellow: Okami's Chapter 1 (Mission Beguins) Arturia's Rerwite on Chapter 1, with dialogues (unfinished) My first atempt at drawing the fist pages, with the history explanation (also unfinished) Arturia's Rewrite on the history part (I only noticed he said he was going to do it after I has already done my version...) Also, Okami put a really long post on page 4 with pretty much everithing we has at that point. If you are interested, all the drawings (mostly character dsigns) I did for this project on my Deviant Art account (some of them are in the "Scraps" part of the gallery) http://zucco1.deviantart.com/ Well... this is it... Also, if you have any ideas for either the art or story, or even if you do a drawing unrelated to this topic, but that you think that looks good, feel free to post it!

It certainly would! Expecially with the backgrounds and final art, if anyone is up to it. Sorry, it's just that since most people haven't posted anything in this topic for a while a sot of assumed most of them got busy with other things or just forgot about the whole deal... It would not bother them if a PMed the ones who showed an interest in doing the art, would it? Would it be a good idea to do a resume of everything we've got so far after we have the names for the first chapter, and them sending a PM to Emi, Krill and MellowMadman11? By the way, what about you, jeftai? You still up to working on the backgrounds? And could post something you've drawn?

Thanks! And feel free to post your own drawings of the SCs too, (that goes for Okami as well!) and if you don't mind I can try do redraw them in my style later. About Noel's brother, Okami wrote earlier: "And as for their days before that I left them out with an excuse that they don't remember much before that day as they were only 5-6 but I also planned to add one of their days before that very important as it would turn out that one of them (Probably Noel) has a onii-chan that she forgot about but to give him big rule latter on as it would turn that after everything happened he got himself mixed with cannibals and eventually become their leader witch is big problem as he would be very god strategiest." Well... thinking about it now, it's not unlikely he is the masked cannibal... If that is true, Okami already said that making him into one of the two children wouldn't fit in... I hope he get his computer fixed soon, or at least he can still take a look at this topic once in a while!

Arturia, thanks! I too have the habit of holding my other arm from behind... Either that, putting my hands in my pockets or playing with whatever object is withim my hands reach ^^; As for characters design... Please, give your thoughts too! You are as much a part of this as me or Okami. It's true that Okami has the broader feel for the story, but that does not mean the characters must look exactly like he thought, as long as they fit their characterisation. Actually, being the one who originally created the characters, he is almost certanly biased towards the ones that look the most like his original image. The same way, being the one who drew them, I'm bound to be incapable of looking at them objectevely. (expecially right after I finished a drawing. Taking a second look at it later helps, but does not solve the problem.) So, having your opinions helps a lot! (Moreover, with only two people making choices it's preatty easy to get a tie betwen two options) With the chapter rewrite, don't worry, there is no need to rush it. As I said before, I've been pretty busy last week so I didn't have time to draw it anyway. Also, I'm planning to do at least one full body drawing for each character that appears in the chapter before doing the names. By the way, does Noel's older brother appear in this chapter? He could be one of the two random children, and they could assume he died in the bombing. Well... If we do that, it would certanly have a huge effect on Noel... It could even be related to how hard it is for her to part with others. What do you guys think? Okami, it a shame your computer broke. I hope you manage to get it fixed soon! it's funny that you liked Akeno #1 better... That might actually the drawing i like the least out of all the ones i posted here... And, other than the ponytail, I'm pretty satisfied with how #2 turned out. Well, I will try to do something we are both okay with! I'm posting all versions I've done of Akeno thus far: Tell me if you guys like any of them! About the drawing of the children... I used some drawings from Studio Ghibli as reference and tried to make their faces round to make them look young. Did it make Orion look fat instead?... Anyway, is it better now? Also... I don't know what should I do about the world map... I did the main continent big so I could draw it better and so it would cover both really hot and cold climates, but from the story's point of view it's size makes no sense... Maybe It would be better if I placed it over Africa, or even drew something closer to Africa in shape? Also... should i make Rouria, and Raepista neightbours or not? as I said before, i think it works better with the story, but if there is some reason to put them in the opposites ends of the continent could you share it, Okami? Oh, about the SCs Okami described, I do plan to post at least one drawing for each before doing the names for their first appearences, but it's not my priority right now. I might do some of them earlier if I feel like it tought. (In particular, I wanna try drawing that masked guy) Arturia, the way you wrote the history part kinda ressembles a narrator. I actually started reading it in Morgan Freeman's voice at some point. ^^; Still, to be honest, i liked your dialogues better... Still, there are parts of it I would like to use, in particular the descripition on how the geography was changed. I will post an edited version of the first pages later. By the way... Why are the factions descibed as "rebelious"?

My cashier work ended this monday, so now I'm back! Ended up not drawing much this weekend since I got hooked to Oyasumi Punpun, but now I'm catching up. Akeno Children Pages 1-3 I did two versions for the first two pages. Sorry, Arturia, I only just saw that you where going to write the history part yourself... Well, I'm not fully satisfied with the ones down here either way, (at least, I want to add a paragraph about the neutral territories and dig sites) so please post your ideas to! Also, about the world map, I only noticed it after drawing it but... Isn't it a bit weird that Rouria and Raepista are fiercily fighting for territory when there is a few hundred kylometers of desert betwen the two factions while Midoristal, wich is between the two factions, pratically doesn't get involved? Or is there some deeper reason to make the world map like this? Either way, I used a different map in each version, so please tell me wich one you guys think that works best with the story. (Or even sugest a third version with the desired changes!) Edit: for the sake of simplicity I omitted some information in the world map, but we can add them later in maps of smaller scales. Any critics or suggestions are welcome! Version 1 Version 2 Oh, and don't worry, I got a bit carried away this time, but once I have Arturia's rewrite of the first part I will try to do a proper name for the rest of the chapter before drawing the finished version. By the way, this is pretty random, but don't you find it hard to write in english without using the world "I"?

Good job, you two, It's getting pretty interesting! I agree with Okami that the first page should give a brief descrition of the world history. By the way, what do you think about making a new calendar starting on the year when World War III ended, and writing the dates as 10 Before Peace or 74 After Peace instead of 2067 or 2041, without letting the readers now exactly how far in the future the story takes place? Also, I'm not sure about using japanese honorifcs... Oh, I don't mean I'm against it, but how about trying to use forms normally used in english? like using titles (sir, sire, milady, your higness...) surnames, first names or nicknames depending on the relationship betwen characters? In particular, I think Minami calling Mahiro by a friendly nickname would work well with story. And I must agree that Hiori seens out of chacter... Other than that, I like the way you write! And I don't think you overdid it... Familiaring the readers with characters in the begging of the story is a good thing! Also, I really like stories that beguin with a warm atmosphere, and then let things scalete to something darker. By the way, what do you think about making some make-belive setting or role-play for the test of courage? Like... they are adventurers exploring a dungeon, looking for a dragon, or maybe even rounins infiltrating enemy territory... And if those two random characters are given a bigger role later in the story, maybe some element of this make-believe could return as well. The masked man could were an acessory, (maybe even his mask) call himself by some name or use some symbol that would sugest a conection with the kids (Albeit he himself might not be one of them). On the other hand... I feel it would be more realistic and add more tension to the story if they simply died in the bombing, so i'm not sure if this is a good idea or not... What do you think, Okami? Either way, I thiink they should have at least as much screentime as the main characters in the first scenes, and they should also be quite proactive if they are going out by themselves. (Maybe they are the oldest mebers of the group, and feel responsible for the rest of the group? not much older, just a year or two... Also, how about making them brothers?) And Okami, I would not describe someone who suddenly shoots his allies or send them to the front lines in order to get them killed as "merciful"... Ps: I'm not going to have much free time in the next 3 days, so I will probably begin the names only after that.

Thanks! And feel free to give suggestions to paneling in the rewrite! Edit: I just finished reading your topic "Into the Night". It's really interesting... Dammit, now I want to see it going forward too! Shame we all have too spend so much time in the real world...

Thanks! Well... I kinda wanted to do the panels too... What if you first posted the rewrite first, and then we both try doing our versions of panel and decide together how will the final version be? Or if you want we can divide who does the panels for each scene...

First of all, sorry for taking so long to answer the posts. Thanks for the map, Okami! (Wow, the geography really changed a lot after the war... is this really the Earth?) Also, I really like cyberpunk! But it looks complicated to draw... Well, I guess I will try to learn how to do it. Could you give a brief description of the climate of the places where the story takes place? I want to use it as a reference when drawing the backgrounds and clothes. Oh, by the way, what are R1, R2, etc? Something like administrative estates? And Arturia, the drawing is good, but I'm glad you agreed to write the dialogues. Could you post it when you've written the cavern scene? I want to try drawing it! No need to rush it, thought... And about the writing style, I think you should just write in the way you like best! Now, the drawings: Minami Noel Hiori

Haha, I know what you mean. Incompetent protagonists who just keep depending on others or going with the flow of events, without ever taking initiative - or worst, taking initiative and then just dragging his allies down - tend to be really annoying. Having said that, average guys don't bother me as long as they have interesting personalities - Okazaki Tomoya, Kyon and Takasu Ryuuji, for instance, are not particularly talented in any field, (with the exception of Ryuuji housewife skills, but never mind that) but I found then all likable characters. Edit: Looking back, I might have had something like chuunibyou when I was a kid. I didn't like stories that did not have some fantastical element, and lived in my own fantasy world. I would start making cool poses, or fighting invisible enemies when I was alone, albeit I was too timid to do it in public. No... I vaguely remember doing something of the sort when bullied. And I think I made some teacher really worried because i was "certain I saw a witch flying in a broom". Well... I guess all kids are a bit like that, right? Nothing to be embarrassed about, right?